Life Lessons

I lost Coco yesterday. I really hope he’s with Oreo.

Just last year, i lost Oreo… http://www.divinemlee.com/oreo/

19 years ago, I was still in school I got the coolest gift ever. Well, gift for myself. I got a dog! I always wanted my own one, we had a couple in the house but d akin yun so medyo deadma ako.

 

I wanted a show dog! One with long hair so I can put ribbons and pretty dresses. I still remember the day when I went to the breeder. I wanted a black and white one! Yung walang bahid na brown kasi bet ko ang color blocking na vivid. haha! kidding aside, i really wanted a pure black and white one. So during my search for the perfect pup, i found one! The best black and white pup in the litter. Unfortunately, ayaw benta kasi chaka daw. No joke, that’s what the breeder said. He’s a runt and they don’t feel comfortable selling him to me (bagets pa ako so sabi nila iiyakan ko kung mamatay sya). But as a hair fanatic, i loved his hair and insisted to get the pure black and white dog. They allowed me to take him home and just pay for the shots and doctor. So in short, parang libre na.

 

When I got home, i was a bit disappointed. Oreo could not walk and chaka ng ipin so i had to mash his food so he could eat. Most dogs walk in a few days/weeks depending on the breed, but Oreo took 6 months. Inavail nya talaga. He wasn’t the pretty dog i expected him to be, naglagas pa yung buhok. But kahit chumachaka sya… super lambing naman so it made up for everything. For his frist day to 6th months old, i had to feed him by hand. SO bad owner na kung bad, mahilig sya sa table food kasi sinasabay ko. And he’s sanay to stay home lang kasi nga hindi sya marunong maglakad. He started moving first by “swimming” on the floor then eventually nakalakad din and started eating on his own.

 

By the 2nd year, bongga na sya. Yung nalagas na buhok gumanda na and i was able to put ribbons na on him. He was always there for me. I know na paguwi ko, there’s someone super excited to see me. Kahit 10 minutes lang ako nawala, the minute i walk in the door akala mo tumama sya ng bingo sa talon.

 

When i was in college, sinabay nya rin yung body clock nya. Every morning, we would be by the door waiting kasi kasama sya sa pagalis ko. Alam na nya yun. When I finally got my own place, i got busy :( I would still play with him but not as much na. May room na ako, before kasi one bedroom lang house ko so he would sleep with me. Minassacre nya rin kaya yung carpet so sa new house may area nalang sya.

But kahit d ko na sya pinapansin as much, never syang nagbago. Still excited to see me. No fail yan. Kung isususlat ko lahat ng ginawa namin together, kukulangin ang blog na toh.

 

Last year, he got sick and I really thought it was time. Doctor spoke to me na to get ready and all but of course hindi ko kaya. I begged and prayed to keep him well and he bounced back. V got me liempo. He said he wanted me to be ok if ever Oreo needs to go to doggy heaven na. Syempre, hindi ko sineryoso. Liempo surprisingly became Oreo’s bestie kahit may isa pa akong dog. Para syang big kuya, to the point na si Oreo yung pinagaagawan ni Liempo and Coco. They made a good team :) Super cute relationship.

 

Last December, Oreo got sick again. More like he’s weak na. 19 years old na sya which is rare for a shih tzu. But kahit poor hearing, blind and no more teeth, super excited parin yan whenever he would see me. So when he got sick, i begged him.. wag naman paabutin mo naman sa birthday ko. He got better. All the way til my birthday. All the way til I got home from Bali.

Last week, manang said Oreo won’t eat na talaga. So bumalik kami sa day one nya. When we had to mash his food and spoon feed him. He was just sleeping narin. And obvious na pagod na sya. He’s not sick though, just old.

Monday was becky nights day. I had that urge to just carry him around the whole day. Tahimik lang sya, but everytime i would call his name, he would try to react kahit mahina na pandinig nya. He would breath hard and try to move. I was crying na, niloloko na ako nila Jake or maybe they were trying to cheer me up. I knew it was time to let him go. I brought him to the room and talked to him. I told Oreo that he can go. Bilin nya na kay Liempo and Coco lahat. Keri na nila yun. Make sure to bilin coz i would need his love when he’s gone and sana naturuan nya yung dalawang bagets.

 

Today, Oreo left for doggie heaven. I feel bad. Im still crying buckets but in a way not as famas as i would expect. He prepared me. Up to the end pinagbigyan nya ako. Pati birthday ko. So parang unfair na if I hold him here longer. When the doctor said that Oreo or Owyo is gone na. I dropped my meeting and rushed there. I made sure he was clean and brushed nicely, fixed his cremation and waited for them to pick him up. The end na pala talaga yun.

 

My heart is crying, my eyes are swollen but I guess I’m ok. Masyado nya naman pinakita gaano ako kalakas sa kanya. Pinagbigyan nya ako paulit ulit. He lasted 19 years.

 

God works in mysterious ways. The other day, my lappy storage disk became full. Ang kulet ko sa twitter how to upgrade. Hindi naman sya sira, in short wala naman sakit. But i had to let go of some files. Finally, after resisting for years, i transferred some files to an external drive. I let go. Parang funny na ginawang sign for me yun.

 

Oreo’s not sick, parang full lang ang storage or life span nya. Sinulit nya. So he has to go na talaga. And mommy just needs to accept. Like how i accepted the extrenal drive.

 

Looking back, pagyayabang ko na Oreo is the pinakamabait na doggie in the whole galaxy. Walang cocontra. That’s it. He gave me joy na hindi ko mabibilang or maquantify so sana talaga nabilin nya ng bongga sa dalawa. Malakas naman ako sa kanya and he never failed me so I’m quite sure he did. Tama nga yung breeder when I first got him, IIYAK LANG AKO PAGNAWALA SYA. OO, but these tears are nothing compared to the joy he gave me. SO keri lang kahit umiyak pa ako bukas, next week or everytime I think of him.

Sa lungkot ko i started searching the net for doggie after life. And i found the RAINBOW BRIDGE. Here it is.

 

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together….

 

Author unknown…

 

Crayola na naman ako. But medyo nakangiti na. Because it allowed me to visualize Oreo well and happy. And naisip ko na hanggang dun, excited parin sya makita ako :) And in a way, parang push narin yan na magpakabait ako para sure sa heaven ang bagsak so on my way makikita at sasalubungin ko sya.

 

Oreo, kahit minsan ang baho mo talaga. Ikaw na. I love you so much. When i finally have my own kids, i wished na magka-oreo sila. A pet who would maximize his life para may kasama silang lumaki. Enjoy ka muna dyan sa Rainbow bridge and wait for me :) Make sure they put BLUE RIBBONS. Sabihin mo bet ko lang nakaribbon ka but lalake ka talaga. Or becky siguro. D mo na chika sakin :)

 

Sorry for the super long post. It’s 3.30am and I’m still crying. Keri na toh. Baka may wifi si Oreo dun, mabasa nya sana. Thank you for the 19 years.

 

Love you OREO :)

 

 

Now, dalawa na sila. The doctor kept on telling me to be ok na coz they exceeded the normal lifespan of doggies. But syempre masakit parin. My friend Melvin told me last night that when dogs go away, baka they saved you from something. D na question yun, they saved me over and over from sadness. They will always be in my heart.

 

Out of all my dogs, Coco was the middle child. Always giving way to the little ones but always una sa pila ng hug. He was the hugger of the group. I will surely miss that. I got him for free coz i fought with a dogfood maker after na poison yung dogs ko before (long story, chika ko next time). Para syang replacement for my lost puppies. I remember one halloween i dressed him up pa as the red parrot to my Janet Jackson sa “together forever” video. Popstars kasi yung theme ko that year. Ang hirap kasi humanap ng parrot na props. Kahit na mahirap yung red wig nya sa ulo, keri lang sya. Basta everytime umaarte sya, hug ko sya.

 

Sya yung fave namin ipasyal, kasi super behave or maybe kasi mataba sya so hindi nya na keri tumakbo takbo like the little ones. Last night habang umiiyak ako, I asked V why can’t dogs live as long as humans. Sabi nya sakin, they are too good for this world. I dunno if totoo yun but for sure Coco was too good. He died of a tumor. A tumor that never nya ipanaalam samin for 12 years. I asked the doctor bakit hindi na detect earlier, hindi naman kasi talaga nagkakasakit si Coco. I’m just praying that hindi nya tiniis yun underneath his hugs. When the doctor called us last night and said critical sya, i was kinda shocked. Kasi just the other day, tumatakbo pa sya sa house ng may sipon. That’s caused by the tumor na pala. I rushed him to the vet when medyo marami na syang sipon, then by night time the called me in. He flatlined. But when I got there, they were able to revive him na. I stayed for 2 hours watching his pulse rate, and oxygen level. Not once did he scare me. He was stabilizing pa. After his last IV injection. Doctor said, pwede ka na umuwi. I didn’t even say goodbye, i just told him he’ll get chicken tom so pagaling sya. Then wala pang 10 mins after i left. He got into a seizure. He didn’t want mommy to see him leave pala. The next call I got he was gone na. But talagang he wanted to let me hug him one last time before going kaya sya siguro nagparevive. I’m so spoiled with my dogs.  It was fast unlike Oreo na mahaba at pinagbigyan ako. I don’t know what is harder. The quick one or the long one. But for sure both masakit.

Coco was never emo. He was always the happy one. And he left me with that attitude parin. Quick and without showing mommy any weakness and sadness. It’ll take me time again to get over. But if there’s anything about Coco, he thought me na kahit may tumor sya, hindi nya pinaramdam, Hugs are still more important :) Nothing can beat hugs. Masmalakas ang power ng hug :) 12 years yun, so ngayon na masakit yung puso ko and my tears parang semi-permanent na sa mata ko since last night. I always think that i should be excited for his hugs when i see him again. That keeps me smiling.

Yung Janet Jackson incident pala namin was a sign of how our relationship will be for years to come. Full of love and hugs.

 

There are times when I look above and beyond
There are times when I feel your love around me baby
I’ll never forget ma’ baby
(I’ll never forget you)

There are times when I look above and beyond
There are times when I feel your love around me baby
I’ll never forget ma baby
When I feel that I don’t belong
Draw my strength
From the words when you said
Hey it’s about you baby
Look deeper inside you baby

(Bridge)
Dream about us together again
When I want us together again baby
I know we’ll be together again ’cause

(Chorus)
Everywhere I go
Every smile I see
I know you are there
Smilin’ back at me
Dancin’ in moonlight
I know you are free
Cuz’ I can see your star
Shinin’ down on me

(Together again ooh )
Good times we’ll share again
(Together again ooh )
That makes me wanna dance
(Together again ooh)
Say it loud and proud
(Together again ohh)
All my loves for you

Always been a true angel to me
Now above
I can’t wait for you to wrap your wings around me baby
Wrap them around me baby
Sometimes hear you whisperin’
No more pain
No worries will you ever see now baby
I’m so happy for ma baby

(Bridge)
I dream about us together again
When I want us together again baby
I know we’ll be together again ’cause

(Chorus)
Everywhere I go
Every smile I see
I know you are there
Smilin’ back at me
Dancin’ in moonlight
I know you are free
Cuz’ I can see your star
Shinin’ down on me

(Together again ooh )
Good times we’ll share again
(Together again ooh )
That makes me wanna dance
(Together again ooh)
Say it loud and proud
(Together again ohh)
All my loves for you

There are times when I look above and beyond
There are times when I feel you smile upon me baby
I’ll never forget ma baby
What’ll I give just to hold you close
As on earth
In heaven we will be together baby
Together again ma baby

(Chorus)x2
Everywhere I go
Every smile I see
I know you are there
Smilin’ back at me
Dancin’ in moonlight
I know you are free
Cuz’ I can see your star
Shinin’ down on me

 

So kung si Oreo may blue ribbons, Coco labas mo yung red wig when we see each other. And get ready to give mommy the biggest hug ever :)

Coco was always the happiest with hugs :)

 

Hope Pritchon and Liempo puppy maging kasing bait at tyaga nila sakin. Oreo and Coco lived pretty long, I’m sure minahal talaga nila ako :)

Much love,

D

  • http://twitter.com/iamhoneycat Honey Lyn Barrera 하니

    aww sad :'(

  • itelhere

    Naiyak na naman ako, I feel you Mother D! Ganyan din kami ng masagasaan ung Sheepdog ng panganay namin (8 yrs ago)… si Gokou. To think na may pamilya si kuya ko, with three kids.. tulala yan for two days dahil masyadong dinibdib kasi nga nakita namin how Gokou winced in pain nang masagasaan siya ng tricycle :( Tapos two years ago naman, my dad’s friend (na nagtatrabaho sa barko, sakto dumaong sa Subic ung cable ship) bought a pup, Australian Terrier, pinaalaga muna samin, I named him Richie (na ayun na din ung pinangalan ng may-ari) Nang magsign-off siya para umuwi na sa kanila, siempre kinuha na samin si Richie, for a week, katabi namin siya matulog kasi ang bango niya, tapos laging nandidila ng legs. Even my mom, na hindi mahilig sa aso, namiss ung paglalambing niya… Cheer up Mother D! Sa 19 yrs at 12 yrs, sobra sobrang memories yung iniwan nila sayo… For sure kalaro nila Coco and Oreo si Gokou namin sa Rainbow Bridge… =)

    • http://www.divinemlee.com Divine Lee

      Thank you.

  • http://www.divinemlee.com Divine Lee

    They can give you unconditional love :) be good to them :)

  • http://www.divinemlee.com Divine Lee

    Thank you babe.

  • http://www.divinemlee.com Divine Lee

    Thank you

  • Nicole

    You are so blessed to have that kind of love from them. My condolences mother. Ito cyberhug for you, >:D<, might not be as lovely as Coco's but I hope it makes you feel better.

    • http://www.divinemlee.com Divine Lee

      thank you

  • http://twitter.com/sgtoledo Sarah Toledo

    nakakaiyak nmn ms. d…. :(

    • http://www.divinemlee.com Divine Lee

      i miss them

  • Nash

    Hi Ms. D! I hope you find time to read this article http://www.upgradereality.com/a-dogs-purpose-from-a-6-year-old/. Hoping that will make you feel better. :)

    • http://www.divinemlee.com Divine Lee

      Thank you so much. I read it and made me smile. Really appreciate it :)

  • http://twitter.com/mcTesoro Cashie

    Naiyak naman ako dito sa office kakabasa ng mala-telenovela story ng dogs.. ang sad and sweet naman…

  • http://www.facebook.com/reigningstill Celerhina Aubrey

    Nakakaiyak! I also have a dog and I just don’t know how i can recover pag nawala sya. :(

  • Bea Osteria

    Mother, virtual hug! :( Pag nakita kita mother, hug na lang kita basta. Dama ko yung sakit! Parehong masakit. Yung tipong mas masakit pa sa heartbreak! :(((( I have 13 dogs. Most of them are shih-tzu. I promise to spend more quality time with them. I’m sure mother they’re smiling at you. I know they love you mother as much as we love you! Smile na Mother! :)

    http://bea-ost.blogspot.com <3

  • baby fierce

    took me few hours to finish the entire blog :'( di keri ng tissue :| towel please :/ big huuuuug for you mother T___T – baby fierce with fierce DIVINE LEE nails :)

  • Mommy Gie

    Awww:( Made me cry :'(

  • http://www.pinkoolaid.com/ Pinkoolaid

    Awww this made me cry. I remember losing my first pet and how devastated i was, he was sickly din kasi and pabalik balik kami sa vet nun but it was all worth it naman. Stay strong :) he’s waiting for you in the afterlife

  • http://twitter.com/jayarcy jay arcy

    awwww. iim crying now and im still in the office. my ofcmates are looking at me strangely. sorry for your loss. pets are really family and they bring much joy to our lives.

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